something old...

It was a last minute call, I just got it from an ex, that she was breaking up with her boyfriend. Now I know I am not exactly Mr. Perfect...

something new....
I think I need something new in life. I will start consulting very soon. I hope to save money and get a nice place to live. I met a woman who is independently wealthy enough to not have to work every day. How great is that.... Life's pursuits any day of the week.

something borrowed...
I have a soldering kit... I am going to take the solar panel I swiped from my boss and build myself an iPod recharger... whether or not I get the iPod seems to be in the works now. At least he can use it to power up his cell phone so he won't miss my calls.

something blue...
My cars have been silver, red, black... What about a blue subcompact... or maybe a civic? I have been feeling blue... I think I suffered three rejections the past month... it's kinda tough when people say they don't want to be friends anymore... it was the one thing I always felt I could count on... friendships.

wisdom beyond years...

I have this one nephew, it's funny that he talks so much. But he's studying Chinese. I took chinese for the same reason that he did. It was the closest I could come to taking a language that was closest to my culture in College. He's doing it at about 10 years younger than I even did. I actually never got a chance to meet anyone who was the same group as myself in college. I think it would have changed the dynamics of college. first year's of college roomate was a ambigously gay Spanish-American, thinking that RanMa was actually a girl, years later I discovered that Ranma 1/2 is a hermaphrodite, more or less because I was confused by what that anime was about. I can only think 10 minutes at a time. Quite possibly turned me off of Anime for some years until I discovered a movie called Ninja Scroll which was a back to basics kind of hero, villian, damsels, and such. I pretty much hung out with all the Queens chinese-american students. I've lost touch with them, It'll be somewhat freaky to run into them again on the street. It seems that I get stopped every year by someone on the street whom I haven't kept in touch with. But hey, this area is a small place anyway. Also trying to locate one Taiwanese girl from Queens but with no luck. We spent a New Years smoking stogies, and almost got tattoos, but I chickened out because I didn't want a saggy symbol of my youth. I'm not a fan of tattoos anyway. Sadly people at work thought we were sleeping together, probably due to our frank conversations about movies, eateries and cultural differences, so I was slightly perturbed by this comment and it most likely affected our friendship, and probably the fact that I programmed out her job to a computer made it worse even more. I wished I had helped her out more, then I could have been canned and moved to New York back in good old 2000 and she could press the enter key all day long. But sometimes I think that there is some strange fates at work, I'll just leave it at that.
I did bulk up quite a bit, and my bench press was way up to 250lbs or so because I was at work working smarter instead of harder and longer so I had more free recreational time to pursue lifes lovely mysteries. I couldn't work out at Bally's anymore because I couldn't get anyone to spot me anymore. I went back to the college gym and had to endure seeing this girl every week and her roomates. It was not fun... I think she dumped me because both her roomates liked me, not sure to what extent for one, but the other liked me quite a bit, which made for an ackward Haloween because I assumed we weren't dating anymore and upset her when I got into her roomies car. Probably all for the better. I think she wanted me to like her eventually so she could be the one to dump me, in a strange universe, I think she didn't forgive me for walking to her friend's car even though it was after she said she only wanted to be friends. Somewhere, someone has a picture of me sitting in a haunted hay ride drinking some yocal beer. I will deny this existence to all my city and Jersey friends as proactively as a certain someone denies being awol in the reserves.
I'm going to lie to my children and tell them I lived here all my life.

It's not who you are that holds you back,

it's who you think you're not. ~Author Unknown

I'm going to admit New Years Eve was a night that had some crushing blows on how I will live my life the next few years.
I hope to turn around this serious bout of depression to an thirst for desire back into my life.